Friday, June 3, 2011

Last cicada post I PROMISE!!!

Even I am getting tired of hearing myself talk about these darn cicadas. They have taken over my life. They cause me to miss all sorts of outdoor events with my kids. But I am pretty happy with myself that I didn't go into hiding completely when they took over. I still went to friends houses, wandered to and from my car at various stores, and I even sat among all their nasty shells at a picnic. Best of all, I don't duck anymore when they hit my wind shield and leave a giant streak of bug guts.

This morning I needed to venture out to get coffee and diapers (for Keira! I mean the diapers are for Keira and the coffee is for me.) I have had no coffee in my household for TWO DAYS. "Why" you ask? Total lack of preparation on my part. I am never without coffee and yet somehow I forgot to buy some. Needless to say, I was not myself this morning. I couldn't function properly, plus I am very emotional without a kick of caffeine.
Fast forward to the drive thru line up at Panera Bread. I place my order of a big fat iced coffee then proceeded to the window to pay. As I was putting up my driver's window to keep the bugs and hotness out, I caught a glimpse of a cicada heading right for my car. My powered window would not go up fast enough. I pushed the button as hard as I could as if that would make the window go up faster! Then as the cicada got closer, I knew there was no time and I threw my body towards the passenger seat and covered my head with my hands and started screaming.  I heard a big "THUNK". I kinda thought the cicada hit the top of the window and flew away. I had a moment of relief, ahhhh. Suddenly, Selina started screaming and crying, "It's on me it's on me!!!" You'd think it was a ticking time bomb about to explode in the car. I looked all over frantically but did not see it. I started pushing the window button to make it go down again hoping the cicada would fly out. But the speed of the powered window was TOO SLOW. ARG!!
"Hold on!!!" I hollered and squealed forward to the drive thru window. Then I hopped out of the car, whipped open Selina's door and hauled her out too, swatting at her dress to get rid of the cicada. Poor Keira who was dead asleep was now looking around wondering what was going on. An audience of Panera workers were at the drive thru window watching the commotion. Then I spotted it behind Selina's booster seat.

We made eye contact.

A Panera girl asked if I wanted a napkin so I could grab it. But I couldn't stop staring at the cicada. I swear if it could talk it would have a happy dopey voice and say, "Now hold on there a minute. I'm harmless really! Can't we just be friends?"
Then I would say, "No we can not be friends. I'm sorry. Shouldn't you be looking for a mate right now?"
I looked at the Panera girl and I was going to ask her to find a brave soul to get the cicada out of my car for me and I would buy them a coffee or something. I could not touch it even with a napkin. Then the guy in the car line up behind me rolled down his window and stuck his head out, "You got a bug in your car?"

I didn't even hesitate, "Yes!!! Would you please come save us??? Please!!"

He stepped out and came to our rescue. He snatched up the cicada and released it back into the wild.

"Oh thank you!!" I said. "You saved the day!" It was all I could do to keep myself from giving him a round of applause.  He nodded and walked back to his car totally nonchalant.

We got back into the car. Selina was wiping her tears and I was trying to calm my racing heartbeat. I told the Panera girl to add that guy's order to mine. It was the least I could do to repay him for his heroic rescue.

Thank you mystery man. Thank you.


Cindy said...

Oh my gosh, I am laughing SO hard right now!!! I'm glad you bought that dude some coffee.

I only saw one cicada at the pool today, so that's a "safe" place for you go now.

But... I hate to tell you... there are still lots of cicadas in my trees, so you will probably have to stay inside during Claire's birthday party tomorrow. I swear I didn't invite them!

Kristin said...

One cicada at the pool??! We should have gone there! I will wear netting over my head at Claire's party (and bring a racket) :)